A Fork in the Road

Recently, I've been reading through the gospel of Mark, an advice from a dear friend of mine.  And as I was reading, I came across chapter 13, the chapter with all the parables.  Then something sparked in my head from being way too excited because I remember our aacf theme last year about the hidden treasure so i skipped to verse 44 just to read it and tried to remember everything I've been blessed to learn.  But then I went back to the other verses, reading through them and letting them soak in my head until i came across the explanation of the parable of the sower, verse 18-23.  

Hear then the parable of the sower: when anyone hears the word of the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what has been sown in his heart.  This is what was sown along the path.  As for what was sown on rocky ground, this is the one who hears the word and immediately recieves it with joy, yet he has no root in himself, but endures for a while, and when tribulation of persecution arises on account of the word, immediately he falls away.  As for what was sown among thorns, this is the one who hears the word, but the cares of the world and the deceitfulness of riches choke the word, and it proves unfruitful.  As for what was sown on good soil, this is the one who hears the word and understands it.  He indeed bears fruits and yields, in one case a hundred fold, in another sixty, and in another thirty.  

After reading through the verses, I could not help but think about my own faith and I asked myself which category did i fall into? first category being someone who has the seed planted, but not actively pursuing a meaningful relationship with God, just passively learning along with the mass along with the norm, and being luke warm about their faith.  second category, have the seed planted with a rocky foundation so that when trials and tribulations come, they fall out of their faith.  Almost like they didnt understand what comes along with being Christian.  The accepted it when emotions run high, or when they assume it is a cakewalk etc.  Yet, being a Christian is no easy task.  Having to sacrifice anything and everything for Him and His glory, is one of the most difficult things to sincerely do.  third category, when the seed is planted, but the thorns being worldly things, all of a sudden become the priority and more appealing than having a Christ-lead life.  Soon the big picture is lost and eventually their faith doesnt last.  Lastly, there's the seed that's been planted in good soil, where the foundation is strong, the surroundings are ideal in helping the seed bear fruit, and their is an undestanding of what it means to be christian and an active passion to strive for God no matter the hardships.
So i thought, where do i fall into this?? Coming to the faith recently, I think i'm in the middle of a test, almost like a fork in the road where i could go either way.  This summer has been full of trials, mainly with my mom having cancer and of course other things at the same time, and i think i can fall into category two or four (the rocky soil, or good soil) with everything that has been going on.  There have been days where I want to give up in self-pity and question what I have learned about God and His love.  Yet, there are other saving days where I feel like I have to keep going, not just for myself but as an example for my family and friends to help encourage others who are going through rough times.  These are the days, that somehow even though all the heart ache I can feel God's comforting love, like when a friend gives you a genuine hug and doesnt let go and all of time seems to pause for a little bit, just enough to know how much He loves us, even if we dont understand the suffering that comes with it.  The future is definitely uncertain, but I look back on this past year, and i cant help but smile knowing how far i've come.  With seeing that, I have faith in the foundation that God has given me through aacf, berean, my brothers and sisters, and even my past experiences. I am so thankful for it all, the encouragements and hard lessons learned, because only through Him that i can stay on the right side of the fork in the road.